Conflicted

My whole life I have lived by this simple rule: listen, follow, and trust your heart.

 

I’ve never had a problem with this philosophy and it’s always proved to me the best choice in the end.  What it entails however is to be trusting, hopeful, and vulnerable at all times.

I say I build up walls to protect myself, but really, I see how it feels first before I build up any. Every decision I have ever made, has been from my heart.

For the first time, I’m conflicted between following my heart, or listening to my head and being rational. (I think it might have something to do with all the critical thinking and education I have received this semester lol)
I’m questioning my belief system, yet again. But this time, my belief is my own personal compass.
 
Is it really wise for me to follow and trust my heart?  Should I listen to what my intellectual and rational mind is telling me?  Prepare for future disaster or consequences? Or go with what I’ve always gone with which is to feel in the moment and not worry about the future consequences. Just go along everyday, not analyzing, not thinking things over, but just feeling and seeing where that takes me.

Today at work I asked everyone what they choose to listen to more.  The ratio was surprising.  Most said head over heart. Which again, made me question whether I was choosing the smartest option.
So after asking my closest friends and coworkers what they would do in my position, I’ve come to a conclusion:

I will still listen and trust my heart, and when it comes to a conflicted situation, (like the one I am in), I need to trust my instincts more than “feelings.”  So by listening to my heart first, my head second, and then going with my initial instinct on what I feel is right for me.

So…..now after my little one day crisis.  I’ve come to realize my instincts and what I am going to do.
I will still go along with it. Enjoy the moment for what it is.  Enjoy the day for all it is.  And live for the relationship in the present day, no worries about whats going to happen, where it will take me, or what I want out of it.

We’re young, no one really knows what they want.

If I do end up getting hurt, well life is one big lesson right? So I grow. I learn. I become a better person with a better understanding of what I like and want.

I FEEL like this is my best decision.

Heart>Head. Always

-KK